No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize