The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Randomize
