Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
