the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Rumble strips road head = magical
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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