you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
