i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
