so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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