Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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