pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize