do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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