We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
