your room smells of hookers.
And success
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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