She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
