Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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