You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
