Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
