Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
