mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
There r osticjed everywhere
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
But break dance skills will only take you so far
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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