dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize