I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize