Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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