I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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