We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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