just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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