But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
