i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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