Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
