Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
