Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
