Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
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