we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize