He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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