The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
