I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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