My nipple is on Facebook.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
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