You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
