TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
