i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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