party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
high people should be assigned attendants
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
