Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize