I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
