We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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