I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
