no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
