It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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