Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
being pregnant is like rehab
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
