so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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