Do you still have your period?
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
