I'm going to jail i love you
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
you inspire me to be a worse person
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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