i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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