Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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